There have been a lot of TV shows about the British royal family over the years. Many (in my extremely limited experience) have dealt with the life and death of Diana, one of the royal weddings, or tributes to the Queen’s history-making career. I’ve heard a lot of really good buzz about The Crown as well, but I haven’t seen it myself (yet) so I can’t speak to it.

And then I was introduced to The Windsors. 

Available on Netflix, The Windsors is a comedy series very loosely based around the royals, “reimagined as an over-the-top comedic soap opera”. As a Canadian who is very unfamiliar with the royal family, this feels like a perfect opportunity to provide some reactions for your viewing pleasure. What follows is my experience of viewing the pilot episode of The Windsors. If you want an idea of whether or not the show is worth checking out, please remember to take my opinions with a very Canadian grain of salt.

(P.S. If you don’t want spoilers for the show, don’t read any further!)

MY COMMENTARY

• Right, so if this is anything to go by, my editor is trying VERY HARD to make me believe that England is an imaginary country where the royals are made up and the points don’t matter.

• Does Prince Charles actually sound like this? Or are they hamming it up for comedy? I don’t think I’ve ever heard him speak, just look uncomfortable in photos.

• Camilla that jewellery is horrendous. Where are my tax dollars going if THAT is the best you can do?

• I’m already confused.

• A SWEAR?! That’s not very posh of you.

• They made some sort of laundry and microwave quip. Is this a British inside joke? Where do I get the cheat notes for these things?

• Why…why is he wearing an apron?

• I love how they’ve put Kate in that blue engagement dress so we can tell who she is. 

• What’s a bog? Is that a toilet?

• WHAT THE HELL, THEY’RE ALL DROPPING TO KNEEL BEFORE HIM?!

• The tasselled pillow I cannot.

• I am Pippa and Pippa is me if anyone I’m related to becomes even remotely famous. Milk it, baby. Milk it.

• Wait is that how Kate and Will met? I thought they met in school?

  • Was she a model?

  • Where’s my fact checker, I have questions...

• Why does that picture of Harry look like every frat boy that’s ever catcalled me in my life?

• The absolute last thing I ever needed in my life was to watch a Harry lookalike have terrible sex. I’m firing my editor for subjecting me to this.

• What’s Cressida?

• Who’s Chelsea?

• Is there a joke I’m missing here???

• Seriously who are these two girls?

• Why are they wearing dumb hats?

• And colour coded like the stepsisters from Cinderella?

• Do people actually have these accents or am I just TOO Canadian and can’t pick out satire when I hear it?

• “Bangies” - What on earth…

• Oh look Molly Weasley is here.

• Who is this woman and why does Phil want her dead?

• Is she a spy?? 

• We’ve been to like 50 locations in less than ten minutes.

• Fancy dress means costume party right?

  • Please tell me they’re going to have goofy costumes.

• BUTT JOKES

• What’s Diamond White, I’m assuming that’s wine.

  • If it’s over ten pounds I’ve never bought it.

• I also assumed it was just like…a royal thing to wear uniforms at weddings.

  • Was unaware for the longest time these guys actually served.

• Are they allowed to have TVs in the palace? I feel like that ruins the #aesthetic. 

• What’s Michaelmas?

• Who’s Ronan Keating?

• Who’s uncle Edward?

• I’m too Canadian for this.

• I also live for show business, I respect this drunk guy. He’s the only valid character so far.

• I still don’t know who these two random girls are with their aspirations to be beauty bloggers.

• What’s with the wall of headbands?

  • Is this another joke I’m missing?

• I also struggle this much with math.

• A Fulham based estate agent DEFINITELY felt like a joke I’m too Canadian for.

• They definitely keep making Kate wear blue so we don’t forget who she’s meant to be, and I respect that.

• Honestly? I’d die for this ridiculous version of Will.

• “Except when to take the cakes off the fire.” What…what does this mean?!

  • British people explain yourselves.

• I also can’t control my basic appetite when it comes to pork pies.

  • I changed my mind, THAT’S what I want when I’m allowed back from exile.

• You’re all literally millionaires and THESE are the costumes you come up with???

• It’s not a costume party until a Sexy Hermione arrives.

• PLEASE CRASH THE HELICOPTER IN FRONT OF THE PALACE FOR A DRAMATIC ENTRANCE!

• I’M BEGGING YOU WILLS

• DO IT FOR THE COMMONWEALTH

• Oh that wasn’t nearly dramatic enough.

• Why are they mad about her being a pirate?

• Oh I get it.

• Well that’s awkward.

• …Slowest dramatic escape ever.

• These monarchs aren’t camp enough.

• Send them back.

And…and that’s all she wrote, folks!

FINAL THOUGHTS

I learned that I know even less about the royals than I thought, because at some points I genuinely could not tell what was satire and what was an actual thing about these people. Though to be honest, that made it more enjoyable for me. 

Biggest takeaway: The royals can apparently afford good wine but terrible costumes, and in that sense we are absolutely perfect mirrors for each other. Who’d have thought?

All in all, this show is a good time! If you’re looking for some easy watching that absolutely doesn’t take itself seriously, consider checking it out. See if you can make more sense of it than this poor displaced Canadian did.

As always, if you have any more British media that I should check out and give my culture-shocked reactions to, let us know in the comments! 

Written by Meg Williams