Cat Calling and Horn Honking - When will it Stop?
Lacing up my running trainers and getting out to pound the pavements is a thing that I do purely for me. Getting out there and ticking off each step with a power playlist or podcast on is my time to think. A totally solo and selfish pastime. A simple win!
A time to let go of that conversation I had at work that rubbed me up the wrong way, or feeling frustrated after being stuck in traffic on the commute, where distractions of unpaid bills and undone housework can not get to me. I don't have to do much to prepare. Just picking up my AirPods and shoving on a scruffy baggy t-shirt will do.
But there are some things we cannot prepare for. That whistle out of a van window. The sound of a horn honking far too close to you, making you jump out of your skin. The slow down and stare as they pass you a little too closely. Who made the decision that “Oi Oi” was an appropriate greeting anyway?
Unsplash: Julian Hochgesang
I started running in January 2020. I had signed up for my first half marathon and was feeling good about setting myself a new challenge. Running does not come naturally to me, even though everyone says that I ‘have the body for it’! Training was hard, slow and full of stitches. I first tried running on a treadmill in the gym, but after about a month, I knew I would succeed better outdoors.
And even though I knew running would bring blisters, and early mornings and aching knees, what I did not account for was for the amount of abuse from certain men that would come with it. Seriously, hasn't the #MeToo movement changed anything? Haven't the women and allies of this world done enough to make people listen?
Even though I live in a relatively quiet area and I was running on country lanes without much traffic, every time I got out there I was subject to something. A whistle, a honk, a stare. One man even pulled up beside me and slow-crawled his car at my speed so he could watch as I ran alongside his passenger side window.
This wasn’t a one-off thing. At the peak of training I was running three times a week, sometimes starting at 6 am and still, every time I got out there, something happened. Some man said or did something that nothing short of infuriated me! On some occasions, it really scared me.
I realise I am relatively ‘lucky’. I have heard of women being chased as they’ve run. Of them being grabbed. And sadly, there are cases where women go out for a run and don't come home. But the fact that things like this are happening at all to women, no matter how small, is outrageous! It is unacceptable! And it needs to stop!
Unsplash: Noah Buscher
We live in a society that carries so much expectation for us to exercise and puts so much pressure to look a certain way, and if that isn't bad enough, when we get out to exercise, we are hit time and time again with being belittled and objectified and frightened. It may not seem like a big deal to some people reading. A honk is just a honk. A beep. A bip. A Toot.
But it is the weight that is carried with that toot. The fact that when you hear it, you automatically panic. Your brain starts to wonder if it will just be a toot. You pick up the pace, try to calculate how far you are away from home. You grab your key out of your tiny leggings pocket because it is the only thing you have that could threaten. You keep your thumb hovering over your phone.
Do these men know the weight of their actions; do they understand that we will remember those two seconds of toot every time we lace up? What do they want to achieve from shouting at us, from looking us up and down… from scaring us?
But the more important question is: How can we change the mindsets of the people who think this is ok? I don’t know the answers, but what I do know is I want to make a change. Even just writing this is making me feel like I’m doing something, but more needs to be done.
I also know I WILL NOT STOP RUNNING! Even though there are days that I do not have the strength to deal with whatever these men throw at me, I will not allow them to stop me from doing something that is only for me, no matter how loud they beep. But I really, really wish it would stop!
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Written By Elle Douglas
